I could have never imagined that I would have to worry about my child not eating. If he is anything like me, he would love to eat... beg for food even. But of course no... he is just like his daddy. They are always too busy to eat. Dez keeps telling me that I should like let him be or go starving even and he will learn to eat when he needs to. But gosh... that is the hardest thing I have had to do. Watching him falling him into a lower curve everytime we go for his checkup is the greatest torture and i dread the moment he goes onto the weighing scale at his pediatrician's. It feels like I had failed to perform my duty as a mother and caregiver.
I dunno... I have yet to reach a Zen mentality on this matter - maybe I will never be able to. It is frustrating but I am keeping my fingers crossed that it is just another phase. Although I am not totally convinced that that will go away since he has never liked to eat and probably will never be.
On the happier note, we bought tons of Mediterranean Heath for the garden and hopefully we will be able to clean up the garden and plant them in the next few days. It's spring soon... can't wait!!!
Sunday, March 4, 2007
Friday, February 16, 2007
Life Station
I have never gotten a good news when my phone rang in the middle of the night or in this case, really really early in the morning. True enough, mom just called to say that my grandma has passed away earlier this morning, about 3.30am (7.30pm Fri night in the Eastern world)
She was an Ox so she should be 94, 95 this year. So she did live a long, long live and it's perhaps just time... Still, we stayed with our grandparents since we were borned and there are so much memories... I don't think I am ready for this... maybe i will never be ready. She is always so energetic; she cooked and did her laundry (manually) all by herself till a couple of years ago when she had a few nasty falls and subsequently lost her ability to move around. Her health just deterioted.
I have to admit that i have a love-hate relationship when comes to grandma. I remember how much I love her cooking, how much i admire her for being able to plant vegetable in pails and they grew like weeds, how thankful i am to her when she sneaked money into my pocket so that i can buy one of those bilingual mags that i absolutely must have every week... But at the same time, she is the one who provoked my mom and made me missed my camping trips because no girl should stay out overnight with boys, she is the one who always my brothers more than me or my sisters because of our genders....
There were a lot of questions, disagreements, etc etc that i wish I could talk it out with her but I don't think that would ever happen now... not that i ever think it is possible. She married my grandpa since she was 7, she had 13 kids, she simply lived in a world alien to me. We shared no similar experience of life and looking back as an adult now, i appeciate her strength. I would not be able to endure the pain of losing my child (she had 4), living by herself for 13 years after my grandpa passed away... These are all too much for me but she did... Remember and moarn the dead but live for those who need you, she used to say.
That is my grandma... Perhaps because she is an Ox. She is stubborn, demanding and conservative. At the same time, she is strong, determined and dutiful.
You had a good life, Grandma and I will miss you.
She was an Ox so she should be 94, 95 this year. So she did live a long, long live and it's perhaps just time... Still, we stayed with our grandparents since we were borned and there are so much memories... I don't think I am ready for this... maybe i will never be ready. She is always so energetic; she cooked and did her laundry (manually) all by herself till a couple of years ago when she had a few nasty falls and subsequently lost her ability to move around. Her health just deterioted.
I have to admit that i have a love-hate relationship when comes to grandma. I remember how much I love her cooking, how much i admire her for being able to plant vegetable in pails and they grew like weeds, how thankful i am to her when she sneaked money into my pocket so that i can buy one of those bilingual mags that i absolutely must have every week... But at the same time, she is the one who provoked my mom and made me missed my camping trips because no girl should stay out overnight with boys, she is the one who always my brothers more than me or my sisters because of our genders....
There were a lot of questions, disagreements, etc etc that i wish I could talk it out with her but I don't think that would ever happen now... not that i ever think it is possible. She married my grandpa since she was 7, she had 13 kids, she simply lived in a world alien to me. We shared no similar experience of life and looking back as an adult now, i appeciate her strength. I would not be able to endure the pain of losing my child (she had 4), living by herself for 13 years after my grandpa passed away... These are all too much for me but she did... Remember and moarn the dead but live for those who need you, she used to say.
That is my grandma... Perhaps because she is an Ox. She is stubborn, demanding and conservative. At the same time, she is strong, determined and dutiful.
You had a good life, Grandma and I will miss you.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
No more kisses... :(
Didn't realize i haven't post anything since almost a month ago. Time flies when you have a toddler i guess. Ayden is such an active kid and full of mischief.
What's new these days? 1) We have to go out for lunch everyday. He is ok with me feeding him mac 'n cheese and sometimes even scallopped potatoes when we are out either in a restaurant or just in the grocery store. But nope, not at home. 2) He refuses to give kisses now. He used to be really generous with his kisses and we get this wet, full-mouth kiss whenever we asked for it but since 2 days ago, he will just shake his head firmly when we ask for a kiss. I hope that passes. 3) He is fighting naps and sleep. He just hates downtime i guess. He wants to have action all the time.
There he is... I think he just woke up and time for me to resume my mommy duty. Till next time...
What's new these days? 1) We have to go out for lunch everyday. He is ok with me feeding him mac 'n cheese and sometimes even scallopped potatoes when we are out either in a restaurant or just in the grocery store. But nope, not at home. 2) He refuses to give kisses now. He used to be really generous with his kisses and we get this wet, full-mouth kiss whenever we asked for it but since 2 days ago, he will just shake his head firmly when we ask for a kiss. I hope that passes. 3) He is fighting naps and sleep. He just hates downtime i guess. He wants to have action all the time.
There he is... I think he just woke up and time for me to resume my mommy duty. Till next time...
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Ever Changing Schedule
Oh well... i guess i won't be going to gym again this morning. Ayden's schedule is changing again and instead of waking up at about 7, he is sleeping till about 8 again. And Dez can't give him his breakfast so there is no way i can make it to my 8.30am aerobics class. :(
So is getting more sleep really better? i dunno... he is dropping his naps too and man, am i pooped by the end of the day...
He is such a sweetie though. He is always so busy but every now and then, he will come to me and give me a kiss on my face. Just make my day... The joys and woes of parenting.... ;)
So is getting more sleep really better? i dunno... he is dropping his naps too and man, am i pooped by the end of the day...
He is such a sweetie though. He is always so busy but every now and then, he will come to me and give me a kiss on my face. Just make my day... The joys and woes of parenting.... ;)
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